Thankful Thursday on Friday morning

Sorry for the late post I went to bed way early last night to catch up on sleep.

We are doing really well here. I give all the credit to God for that. There isn't a day that goes by that I don't think wow what an incredible provider He is to me and my girls. He provides every need and listens to every want. He blesses me in so many ways.

Just yesterday I received an email from one of Craig's friends at BB&T just reminding me that people are still praying and thinking of me and the girls. A lot of people say well people go on and just forget about the pain that you are in. I have not felt that at all. I am not sure if we are just that loved or if we are moving forward so the world is not crumbling around us or a little bit of both but there are very few days that I feel forgotten. God sends little notes and sweet conservations through so many of His faithful followers. Such an amazing provider!

Grateful list:
- 30 minutes that I get to watch Bubble Guppies with Hannah in the morning. Emily and Morgan get on the bus about 7:20 and Hannah and I have 30 minutes to cuddle and watch cartoons before I take her to school. She knows most of her colors and is so smart. blessing.
-working from home. WHAT A BLESSING! This allows me flexibility to be there for the girls and not have the hassle of the commute. Just love it. It is an absolute gift.
-friends: God has sent me the most fabulous people on the planet. Just love them.
-church:  It is so important to have a place that helps create that foundation that we stand on each day and say "hey we are doing okay". Love that place.
-my brother: YEAH! Uncle Brad is coming in this weekend. Hooray!!

This weekend is so busy. Saturday - my assistant's wedding, Sunday - game time BABY! Go Cats!! Monday - Familypooza at SE!! Pray for sanity and good FUN. I have prayed for joy after the long cancer journey and He has provided and then I feel guilty for being joyful about life in general. We still have times of sorrow b/c we miss Craig but God is good and we are grateful.

Happy Labor day weekend! Thanks for you.

Craig, if there are blogs in heaven we are going pretty good, I love you, I miss you and I will see you again. And I moved some pots and pans around in the kitchen and it still feels so strange that you don't need to know stuff like that since you are not here to unload the dishwasher. sigh. love you.

Thankful Thursday: Emily gets baptized

Emily was baptized on Sunday afternoon. I am so happy for her and so thankful that God nudged her heart to make that committment at such a young age. I am so proud of the person she is.

More to come and hopfully the video... later it is late...

Craig, We miss you, we love you and we will see you again.

PanCan day at the Cubbies game

Saturday we made the trip to Cincinnati for the Reds vs. Cubbies game. It was sooo much fun! I think Hannah ate her weight in junk food. We had about 80 tickets sold and filled what seemed like about a half section. After the game we went back to Uncle Jim's house for a cook-out. It was so great and we felt so supported at the event. It was hard to know that a HUGE piece was missing but it was really great to be around family and friends that are like family!! :) 

I really thought the Cubbies were going to pull it out in the last inning. Craig loved a good under-dog win. :) Missed him like crazy at that game.



The girls and me at the game. :) Go Cubbies.

Hannah eating, geez.

Lucy and Em hanging

The Dant family, always so wonderful to have them

Morgan and Emily eating cotton candy

My family

The Cincinnati skyline as we walked over the bridge

The Merimees: Michelle (the original), Eddie, Justin, Jacob, Sara

Knarrs

Hannah with Aunt Kathy

Mom and Hannah

Ah, Emily and Riley :)

MORGAN!

Craig, we missed you like crazy at the Cubbies game on Saturday. Love you.

First Day of school for Emily and Morgan

There are so many events in the past week that I need to blog about!!

First one:  Wednesday, August 15th Emily went into the 1st grade and Morgan had her first day of Kindergarten at Kenwood Station. They hopped on the bus without looking back. I asked Morgan several times if she wanted me to drive her to school and she replied with "Why would you do that?" B/c I love you and most kids are kind of attached to their moms on the first day of school... Nah, I'm good was her attitude.

A year ago I worried about any transition with Morgan but this year she was so excited about Kenwood. The first thing that she said when she got off the bus that afternoon was "That was much better than JK, they don't have naps." She loves it!

So here are some quick pictures of the first day of school for Emily and Morgan.

Pictures from my Birthday BBQ

Pictures courtesy of Carla O!

adorable decor

Hannah Jane waking up to join the party

Morgan excited about new friends

Roy grilling out

nice spread

the kids table

the girls

Check out the angel food cake the girls made mommy! YUM!

Good food, great friends, fabulous birthday. :)

The last day of summer

Today was the last day of summer for Emily and Morgan. Morgan starts kindergarten tomorrow and Emily 1st grade. They are so very excited to be going to school together. As we wind down the summer I have to reflect on all that we have been through. It has been a summer of looking back and really pushing to look forward. We had some great times last summer with Craig and we have created some great memories as a family of 4 this summer as well.

There are days that I just want to start lopping off all the first and just press fast forward to get through this year. Then there are days that I want to slow things down b/c I feel like I am forgetting little things about Craig.

It has been a summer of constantly reminding myself to fix my eye on Jesus. He is the only one that can bring peace and love to every situation. Cancer-land. Grief-land. Moving forward without anxiety. It take surrendering to Him each and everyday. The hard days and the the easier day.

The only thing left on our Summer checklist is the Reds vs. Cubbies game this weekend. Go Cubbies.

This week is a big week for the Merimee girls starting tomorrow.

first day of school. Cubbies game. Emily's baptism.

Pray for our upcoming events. (picture to come)

Craig, lots going on and missing you at each event but we will see you again. Love you.

Thankful Thursday

Just under the wire for Thankful Thursday!
I am so thankful for several things this week:
-Oldham County School's teachers, staff and principals etc. I feel so blessed to be in a community that the school are FULL of amazing teachers that love what they do!
Special prayers for Mr. Morris the new principal at Kenwood Station. You have some tough shoes to fill, mister and I pray that you let the Lord guide you through each decision this school year. Welcome to Kenwood. :)

-Thankful that Emily has decided to be baptized at Southeast (oldham campus) on the 19th. She brought this up about a month ago and we have gone over scriptures, the story of when Jesus was baptized and she wants to make the commitment to follow God's path for her life! (mama bear is so proud!) We have met with a decision counselor and a minister at SECC and she wants to move forward with their support. So excited about her love for Jesus and her maturity to make this decision.

-I am thankful that we have the PanCan Cubbies vs. Reds game to look forward to next weekend! We have 65 people in our section going! wow! love my peeps. :)

So there are a lot of things that I am so grateful for. There are many many more but I am jumping off here tonight. more to come....

Craig, thanks for you. :)

My birthday - the big 3-4 :)

When I turned 30 I had a really hard time. I thought my life was set and I did so many "first" in my 20s that I thought there will not be too many changes in my 30s and was depressed about getting older. In my 20s I got married had 2 kids, settled into my career, bought a house, paid off cars. Things were set to roll right into the 30s with little waves, if any. Oh my how life has changed since then... I thought things were so set.

I realize that dreading a 30th birthday is not a popular view for those who are older than I am but it was how I felt 4 short years ago. My dad died when he was 49 and although I assume I will make it passed 49, when I parent dies you inevitably have a number that is engraved in your head of what might be your own fate. Although I don't partake in the habits that he did, that number still lingers out there and with that each birthday I was closer to that number. So 4 year ago I had a really hard birthday. I took the day off to sit on my couch and cry (literally). Each year since then I have just wanted to forget my birthday and just pretend it was just another day.

This year was quite different. Although I didn't want a lot of fanfare or big party I didn't dread it like I have in the past. Although I am now the same age that my husband died at I am so grateful to be here this year. I know that life is precious and each year is a gift. I will not complain about being a year older b/c Craig would have done anything (and DID do everything) he could to see another birthday. So to complain about another birthday would be silly and selfish. It is gift and I thank God for another birthday here on earth. Although this year there was not a little Tiffany's box on the kitchen table with cream color roses from my favorite person on the planet I am still so thankful for all that he has provided. I wore my Tiffany's cross necklace that was my gift last year and thanked God for the wonderful gift of a loving husband that I got to have for 10 married years.

last year:



I notice his handwritting on the card envelope. (sigh)





This is what was in the box. ah and my wedding ring is still on my left hand... (sigh)


We did have a great weekend with dear friends from work and I will update the blog with those notes when I get some picture to accompany that update.

Craig, I missed you on my birthday but I know that we spend more together eventually. love you. :)

Hilton Head pictures and an update

As you could tell from my tone of Thankful Thursday it was a hard week. Coming back from vacation was hard with summer winding down, spending vacation without Craig, and remembering all things that when on at the beginning of August last year was REALLY hard. On August 2nd of last year Craig went in for a scan that we knew wouldn't be good. He had been off chemo since April and we had a great summer traveling different places with the girls. HHI last year was our last week of "normal" (as normal as a gets with cancer looming over your head anyway) as a family of 5. It was the end of the chemo break and after that scan we never had another scan that was good news.

There was more to the stress of the week but I haven't really decided how transparent life needs to be on this blog. But just know that your prayers for our healing are much appreciated as we continue to wade through this new life.

So Monday through Wednesday I did a lot of crying, praying, thinking and not sleeping all too well. On Thursday I was determined to pull myself out of the funk. I did a lot of praying, journaling, making my list etc. I went to SECC Encounter night and submersed myself into the Word and attending the grief group. So by Thursday I was pulling through and came to the conclusion that I wasn't giving God enough credit. I give Him ALL THE GLORY for getting us through cancer-land. We have grounded ourselves in His plan, we still had joy, peace and love even through the most rotten situation so why wasn't I letting go and letting God through this new journey? To constantly surrender is the most difficult but still brings the most peace. It took 3-4 long days to get there but I am so grateful that I walked through the fire rather than around it and I can say the past couple days have been good days. I am trusting in His plan. (Jeremiah 29:11) Wasting away with anxiety, tears, worries and no hope is not the way He wants us to live. He wants us to have Hope and Peace each day b/c God is good all the time. So I am taking a HUGE sigh of relief that He has a plan. It isn't anywhere close to what I had planned for my family but I trust Him.

So on with some more pictures from the trip....



what is the seating capacity in an Odessey?




gator in Sea Pines!



dinner at the Salty Dog

The ones who climbed the lighthouse

Scene from the top of the lighthouse

waiting for Greg Russell

On stage at Greg Russell

one of the many lunches on the screened in porch

Hannah hanging out the night of Gwen's Birthday dinner

Hannah feeding the birds Cheez-its

Hannah eating pizza (commando!)



Everyone on the trip this year

Friends that are like family!

waiting to get in the pool

Cheerleaders! (there is a picture of me doing this with them that Deitz has, I hope it never surfaces- yikes!)



Chad and Kurt getting into the fun. Don't the girls look so little?




Hannah has NO FEAR of the the water!!



the ride home. She is trying on Barbie shoes - we were running out of things to do.



Sisters at the beach



Craig, If there are blogs in heaven, we love you, we miss you, we are making due and trusting in His plan and we will see you again!!!