just an update

I have been slacking a little bit on Thankful Thursdays b/c I am doing thankful days on Facebook this month. I could list all those things here but I figure I would give you an update of what has been going on around here.

Things have been normal here. We seem to be figuring out the new normal without Craig day by day. Every day we miss him but the intensity of the situations seems to have settled down a bit lately. We ran on high emotions for so long it feels very strange to just be settled into new normal. At times I think maybe I am getting depressed but I think it is really just the difference in the intensity of the past vs. now. Although we have daily struggles we are working through those.

I can say for a fact that raising three girls is not a job for one person. I am struggling with the schedules and after school activities and only Emily and Morgan have them. The thought of Hannah having hobbies in the future makes me crazy. After the holidays we are getting down to one activity each. This week has put me over the edge. Mondays Morgan has soccer, Tuesdays Emily has dance, Wednesdays Emily has choir, today they were doing art therapy, tomorrow we are going to Light up the Summit (more on that later), Saturday Emily has Edge (which is extra projects on top of what they do at school), Saturday evening Emily has choir performances and Sunday she has more choir. So after this week we should be getting back into easier times. Choir has been a bit intense this week. I think the performance should be fun but I am wondering if Emily will do it again next year... we will see. Lesson learned: ease up on the after school stuff, quality time with them is more important.

Tuesday morning I went to donuts with dad at Kenwood (Emily and Morgan's school). I gave them a choice to take Scott, Brent, me or just skip it. They said they wanted me to go. I was the only mom there that day. As I drove passed Craig's plot (you can't get into my neighborhood without driving past the cemetery that Craig's body rest in) I cried. It isn't fair that he didn't get to go to donuts with dad with our girls. It is just not fair!! It is not a major event in their lives but it is still one that he should have gone to. They didn't say anything and it didn't seem to bother them. It didn't bother me too much there other than I was the only chick in the gym eating donuts but it really caught me when I pulled passed the cemetery on the way home. He got to go with Emily last year and I remember sitting on the couch later that night and he worried about who would go to things like that with them. He didn't want them to miss out and he didn't want them to be singled out and feel awkward not being able to go. I told him then that we would just take one event at a time and deal with them as they come along. I then made a joke that I wont repeat on here but we laughed together and I think he felt comfortable knowing that I was going to be able to tackle each situation as they come. So we are. I don't know some days we do it well some days not to much but we are doing it one day at a time.

Donuts with Dad 2012 (what a goofy picture but whatever)

Craig, if there are blogs in heaven, we miss you, we love you and we will see you again.